Day #20 of 21 Days to Disciplined Writing


From Camari Carter-Hawkins

Hi there, Carol Anne!

This is the second to the last day of our 21 Days to Disciplined Writing Challenge.

Let's make it fun. Write about your biggest pet peeve, in detail. For me, I can not stand mouth noises when people eat. Food swirling in mouth, the smacking noise that happens when people fail to eat with a closed mouth - yes, I can not stand that.

I want you to write about your biggest pet peeve in detail and convince an offender to stop.

Have fun. Let loose today.

Camari

#21DDW

This one is easy…MANSPLAINING in particular when he uses the word ‘okay’ at the end of a breath.

Adult men of America, you know who you are, I do not need to mansplain this to you. You do not need to explain to me how to use a cell phone or a computer or how to read a map or how to change a tire or how to fill my gas tank or how to set up a tent or oh my goodness, the list goes on. Okay? When you are mansplaining something to me, like I am a child or just arose from a nap, like Rumplestiltskin, okay, and you use the word okay in your mansplaining, that word, okay, you use to pause to ensure I am tracking your teaching, makes me crazy and it also makes me know you are in full mansplaining mode.

When you use the word okay at the end of your breath it is clear to me that you think I am a child who needs you to tell me about the world. I do not need you to explain things to me, especially when I have just told you what my options are and what I plan to do. You do not need to re-explain them to me. I do not need you to take me by the hand and show me the errors of my ways since, now listen up, I know this may be hard for you, and though I may make errors, I am not asking you to fix it or me. I am, like you, a human being who is learning all the time. I do not know everything but, ahem, I don’t think you do either. Also, and this is a dead giveaway, when you mansplain things to me, I find you invariably don’t know what you are talking about or think you are the best one to tell the world all about it. My guess is someone invented it. They are the best ones to tell the world all about it. And, BTW, I can look it up on the internet, if I am so possessed to do so.

Ladies, (and gentlemen, should you be so inclined to learn something of interest,) I found these examples of mansplaining on line. (See fellas, I can research and find things out on my own.) Gina Mei is a writer for Cosmopolitan and quoted Tracy Clayton who put out a tweet (I know how to use twitter, guys, isn't that cool?) asking for examples of mansplaining. They are hilarious. Here are a few and you can go here for more:

I once had a friend mansplain to my roommate how to ~correctly~ pronounce her own name bc he thought she was doing it wrong.

At the racetrack – where I’ve worked for 14 years – men regularly try to explain to me how gambling works as I take their bets.

Obstetrician disagreed that my baby was about to come. Mansplained & left for soda. 3 mins later: Baby born, no doc in room

One time a guy explained to me how prescriptions work. Like..."first the doctor decides which medication"

Also, if you want to see the word, okay, used in its infuriating glory, go to the interview of Steve Bannon. Charlie Rose interviewed him on 60 Minutes this past Sunday. His use of okay is classic.

Ladies, you know what I’m talking about. When he says. okay, you know he is in lecture mode, mansplaining, and wants you to be sure to stay with him, okay, because he is going to move on with the lecture, so stay with him, okay, because you need to understand him because he is the man, okay, and you are the dummy which is not even a question, okay, it’s a signal that you must take heed, okay, that he knows all that there is to know and since he knows all there is, you must be sure to stay with him, okay, because otherwise you might not know, okay, and as an added benefit you would miss out on his brilliance, okay, for him to dazzle you with, okay, you with me? stay with me now, okay, because you wouldn’t want to miss this, okay, how brilliant he is.

Stop! Just stop will you? I get it. You have leftover memories of your dad thinking your mom was a dummy or you remember him mansplaining things to her or you still live in the idea that women are dummer than men or perhaps you could mansplain this to me? Why men feel the need to explain things to women, please?

Okay. So I am not blaming you for your ignorance, okay, well, maybe I am, but I’m not, I get it that your brain has been permanently imprinted with the notion that men are supposed to know everything and women are supposed to serve, but honey, that was over 70 years ago and we are in the 21st century and things are a lot different now. We even have women in congress and you don’t think she has a man running around behind her mansplaining all of this stuff to her, do you? Well maybe you do but I would bet a lot of money on that one, if you believed it, because then I could gloat at how much more money I have than you when you lost. But that is mean-spirited so I won't do that but, fellas, I think it is a good idea for you to come up to the current trend of things, okay, where women know stuff and they want to be treated as equals, okay, or even respected as someone who knows stuff or even, I know this is hard, the one who might know something you don’t, okay, because that might help whoever you may be pursuing to want you to respond, okay? You get me?

Namaste’ y’all

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